preparing for the bumpy night

Double, double toil and trouble
Fire burn and cauldron bubble!
— from Macbeth

At the beginning of a new year, I am troubled, deeply troubled, by all the trouble I hear and see on the daily news. I worry that today’s troubles will indeed be doubled tomorrow.

As I growl and hiss at “those idiots” in the news, I may feel I can’t do much to change the worst of what I see.

But before I go into a full-fledged fit, I’ll remind myself:

“Okay, maybe your power is limited, but you can help the world by working to become a better person.”

But what does that mean? How do I work to become a better person? Well, basically it goes like this…

I try to see my flaws instead of projecting them onto “the other”…Then I work on fixing those flaws, knowing real change can only happen slowly…

I try to deal with my inner conflict…I try to go below my anger and deal with the pain that drives that anger…

I try to accept the grief that comes with being a human being. I know if I don’t, the grief may sneak up and pull me under.

That’s pretty much it—what I do. Maybe you noticed how the word “try” kept popping up. Yeah, it’s a real struggle.

But to be honest, sometimes I don’t really try that hard—or try hard enough.

But though I often lapse, I never give up. And I never will. I won’t because I want to feel I’m doing a little something to benefit our world.

Of course, I also try for my own benefit. Over time, I’ve realized the obvious: as I slowly become more of the person I want to be, I actually feel better. Emotionally, physically. In spirit.

Which I guess is another way of saying: I feel stronger. I’m becoming stronger.

Which is needed, because as Bette Davis said in All About Eve:

It’s going to be a bumpy night!

And the only one who can fasten my seat belt is me.

About Michael Patton

Michael R. Patton, in his own words, “likes to make stuff”. This stuff includes novels, new fables and myths, poetry, cartoons, essays, and videos. The ideas that run through that work can be found in the titles of his books. For example: “Searching for My Best Beliefs”. Basically self-taught, he describes his slow, tedious journey of discovery as “crawling blindfolded through the labyrinth”. He has lived and worked all over the United States.

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